The Pinch Hit Men – June 23^rd Game

Congratulations!  League Commissioner Tony Ferrazo officially invites you to the 2004 YMCA Co-Ed Softball League Playoffs.  Your hard work, team spirit, and the fact that there are teams worse than yours earn this coveted spot.  Let’s play ball!  

The B61 Lineup

• Alyce as catcher
• Jonathan as pitcher
• “Run It Out” Raible at first base
• Betsy on second
• “A/C Delivery Man” Matt at shortstop
• Coach Jamie at third base
• Steve in left field
• Anthony “Yo!  I’m one of you guys” in center
• Lawyer Alex in right center field
• Tamara in right field
• Adam as DH
• “Rip It” Whipit as backup DH
• Amy as backup second base
• Johanna “Still waiting…”  as backup catcher
• Alyce as backup right field
• Big Alex as backup center right field

• “I’m Amy’s lesbian East German on hormones lover.  Can I play?” Jim and Gabe as bench support.  Jeff stopped by for a quick B61 support with his dog.

The Game

I confess.  I’ve been putting off writing about this game.  I don’t know why.  It was a fun, exciting, and good game.  It wasn’t as painful as a Robots game, as tense as a Schnack game, or as disappointing as Angry Wade’s.  Alas, the story must be told.

The field was muddy, and the ump was serious.  The Hit Men were meaty (even the women,) and B61 was fired up.   My first impressions of the Hit Men were:

A)    These were large men.   The women all looked like softball players from my high school who used to beat me up.  Not really, but they could have.

B)     This team knew what they were doing and took their game seriously.  What other team has had batting gloves???  One girl even had her own bat and glove bag.

C)    There were about 30 of them.  How did they all fit in the dugout?

They looked tough, and started off 2-0 by the end of the first inning.  Yet, B61 was rebounding from a loss.  You know what that means.  We kick into action, especially with the middle of our lineup at bat.  Betsy, Capone, Jonathan, Tamara, and several others get good hits off Big Joey the pitcher (He really was Big Joey!) and we’re up 4-2 by the end of the second.   We keep playing on fire – 5-2, 8-3, and 10-3 by the bottom of the fifth.

2 walks (not girls!) and a base hit(is that right or was it a walk and two base hits?) brings the bases loaded for the Hit Men.  Their Casey stepped to the plate and met the challenge – a long fly ball over Big Alex’s head for a grand slam.  We shut them down soon after, but the glimmer of hope was back in their eyes – 10-7 after five innings.

B61 was not to be daunted, and we struck back with two runs.  They responded with two as well.  12-9 with one inning to go.  Ooh, I wanted to win this game.

No runs for the Bus Stops in the 7^th brought the hungry Hit Men to the plate.  “Let’s win this!  I’m starving!”  There’s a cheer to remember from their third base coach.  They bring the woman with her own softball bag up for her first at bat.  Pop fly to Rip It.  1 out.  Then, I’m not sure what happened.  It seemed like I faced 10 men in a row.  What happened to all of their women?  Apparently, they brought out the pinch hit rule where a guy can bat for a woman as long as she doesn’t play anymore.  If we had tied, I guess they would have played without any women in the field.  Women or no, that wasn’t the problem.  Base hits were the problem.  Where did they learn to hit all of a sudden?   They got hit after hit, and that’s all they needed.  A stunned Bus Stops watched as the Pinch Hit Men scored four runs to steal the victory at 13-12.  I’m still a little stunned.

Memorable Moments

• Play at second to Betsy from a hit to Jonathan
• Matt tagging the runner caught between second and third after a strong relay from Lawyer Alex.  “That?  That was nothing,” said Matt.
• Anthony’s running in catch with a toss to Betsy for another out at second
• Johanna coming to the mound to get my head back when the count was 3-0.  “I know.  He’s not even a girl.”  It worked, and I didn’t walk the guy.
• When the first baseman almost killed herself falling over the dirt pile to try to get a ball I hit foul.  “I’m ok.”  B61 cheered for her effort.
• “Just wink and wiggle your butt.  The pitcher will walk you.” -- Johanna’s advice to the Lady Bus Stops.
• Anthony waving off the pitcher telling him that his outfielder wasn’t ready.
• This was our first game without a homerun

Player of the Game

Once again, Betsy earns MVP.  2 base hits and a walk, caught fly balls, and two clutch plays at second.  With hitting like that, I guess she should take long batting practices like before this game.  She played a great game.  I really hope that wherever Alex forced her to go was more important than our team.  J

My Soapbox

I got a call last night from Mary Sue Johnson from Downhome, Indiana, last night.  She apologized for her role in losing the game.  She explained that when her husband had asked her what she wanted for dinner, she said, “Italian.”  “I’m sure that’s what tipped the scales in favor of the Hit Men.  I’m so sorry.  Please apologize to the team for me.”  That’s the thing.  Everyone thinks there’s something he or she could have done better to win the game.  It’s true.  A stronger hit, not dropping a ball, a better throw, more inside on a pitch – any number of things could have helped us win the game.  Then again, there are so many things that we did to ALMOST WIN that game.  We played really well with B61 style against a good team.  We CAN beat any team.  It’s just a matter of the day.  In this case, we lost.  We had fun though.  Isn’t that why we play?

Web Site

You can see all of the writeups at http://mysite.verizon.net/vze5b5g6/